May the wings of liberty never lose a feather.B reakfast with Marni Senofonte, LA-based super-stylist to Beyoncé and Kendall Jenner, was never going to be a slice of toast. Here’s to America’s colors, the colors that never run. “Here’s to the Army and Navy and the battles they have won. May you work like you don’t need the money, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, screw like it’s being filmed, and drink like a true Irishman.Ĥ0. Here’s to the women who have used and abused us.
Here’s to lesbians, because they have good taste.ģ8. Here’s to doing and drinking, not sitting and thinking.įriends standing on river bank with beer Photo: Emma Innocenti(Getty Images)ģ7. To hell: May the stay there be as fun as the way there.ģ6.
May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.Īnd here’s to the girls who say they never will,ģ5. Cheers to beers and legs behind your ears.ģ3. May our penises always be harder than our lives.ģ2. So let’s all get drunk and go to heaven.ģ1. I want to thank you all for coming, especially my parents, years ago.ģ0. Here’s to the women who love me terribly. Women friends toasting with shots at a bar Photo: Sam Diephuis (Getty Images)Ģ7. Here’s to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. But a whiskey glass and a fat girl’s ass are home sweet home to me.Ģ6. A rich man lives in a castle, a poor man lives by the sea. Better to be a well-known drunkard than an anonymous alcoholic.Ģ4. So let’s get wasted all of the time, and have the time of our life.Ģ2. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. Here’s to staying positive and testing negative.Ģ1. To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya.Ģ0. To the kisses we’ve snatched, and vice versa.ġ9. Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives … and to the “good life,” whatever it is and wherever it happens to be. Take everything in moderation - including moderation.ġ6. Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties.ġ4. There’s not another creature on heaven, earth, or hell, that can take the juice from the nut without cracking the shell.ġ3. So fine and divine, they bleed every month, and bear every nine. “I’d like to say a little prayer for world peace.” -Phil Connorsġ2. (Sinatra)įriends Toasting Wineglasses During Party Photo credit: Mirko Vitali / EyeEm (Getty Images)ġ1. Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. The liver is evil and must be punished.Ĩ.
To the new couple: Never sweat the petty things, but always pet the sweaty things.ħ. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap.Ħ. Here’s to the women, with little pink shoes who steal all our money and drink all our booze now, she’s not a virgin but that’s not a sin, cause she’s still got the box that the cherry came in.ĥ. I would rather be with the people in this room than with the finest people I know.Ĥ. Group of friends celebrating with champagne Photo credit: Flashpop(Getty Images)ģ. To the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
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